New Beginnings

Hello, Bonjour, Guten Tag

Over 4 months ago I lost the spark that helped me blog and take pictures and be Chelsey. Alas, I say. No more! 2016 is the year I get my spark back and find happiness within. I mulled a lot over the past few weeks to write a post but I just haven't found the time or the motivation. I've just read through my last post and it made me sad that I still feel the exact same in some aspects, which has only given me the drive to change everything about it.

2015 has been a rollercoaster to say the least, for those who've read my posts before you'll have put up with my hatred of education, money, jobs, life, people... everything in general really. I've always been one to voice my opinion and I doubt that will never change but I don't think I could have ever prepared myself for life after University. I'm still exactly where I was during that period of time, clueless about my future and unsure of what it holds for me now. But I do know something, nothing comes easy. I was so determined to graduate and be the best I can be and have this fabulous job and earn loads of money or just save and travel the world but I succumbed to the pressure of adult life, I moved into my own flat, got a dog, tied myself down and became the person I vowed never to be; thinking I would find what I wanted if I just stuck at it. I can now say, that has yet to happen. Don't get me wrong I'm happy to have achieved what I have done these past few months, but these achievements are nothing that make me internally proud of myself. Honestly, I get so overwhelmed sometimes I wonder whether 22 is the new mid-life crisis age.

We get to the time of year where we give ourselves new found hope and goals to take into the next year that give us the focus to continue and hopefully make changes that stick around. I've got my usual be healthy (she says whilst eating a box of toberlone), rejoin the gym, see the world, be less moody, smile more, have patience, be more open, fall in love, find a career but above all I just want to be at peace with myself. I've spent so much time being at war with my own mind I've lost count on the bits of life I could've lived a bit further, with more excitement and made more memories. I've over thought situations that didn't even need a second glance. What do you want for 2016? I just want to be sat here typing this time next year looking back over my year feeling satisfied that I grasped every opportunity having become the version of me I deserved to be.


Don't get me wrong though, 2015 hasn't been all bad. Since my last post my Dad had his reversal operation and got his life back, I turned a year older, got a beautiful little (devil) puppy called Doris, revamped my flat in the best Chelsey way possible and had the most wonderful Christmas, with the most wonderful family. Although I've got a lot to change, there's always the positives and that's what keeps us going. Stick at it world, if times are hard we must plod on and aim high.


Happy New Year bloggers. Until next time.


Chels
xo

Routines


We live our life in routine. Different routines, but routines nonetheless. We wake up and go about our daily duties carrying out the same mundane tasks of employment, eating, talking, laughing, sleeping. Day by day by day. Do you ever just stop and think of what your life would be like if you didn't live on the line of routine? 

I constantly dream of far out places and different cities to open my eyes in. Exciting adventures and becoming the version of me I've always wanted to be, the one that didn't care, the one that didn't over think every scenario every second of every minute of every day. But alas, I do. I get anxiety, I go bright red in every situation... how do we not be the person we're so used to being? If I wasn't me I imagine I would be far greater, I'd have accomplished so much all because I'd have told society NO. No, I'm not going to give in to the pressure of what you see fit for me. I'm going to live each day as it comes and enjoy every second; not living under the thumb of somebody who gives me orders and tells me how well I can do something. 

I think that's whats wrong with todays world... we care too much, we think too much and above all we dream too little. We over weigh the cons with the pros, I do it everyday. Everyday I contemplate buying a flight on my credit card and leaving all my worries and stresses behind. I succumb to the pressure of money and what people will think of me. I don't know what to do or where to go with my life and that scares me more than anything, but why should it? Why at the age of 21 should I be worrying when I should start putting into my pension or when I'm going to meet someone who likes me for me? I guess what I'm getting at in this post is just allowing my brain to pour out. I have these thoughts daily and carry them like a weight on my brain, constantly thinking and hurting. Why? Why do I let them? Because society makes us believe that we are only right in this world when we've got everything 'perfect'. The job, the partner, the money, the security. Screw the security, live life how you please. 

I hope my brain let's me realise that one day.



Chels
xo

Dear Education System,

Although my time in your capable and what once felt like trustworthy hands has come to an end, I felt a letter was the only way I could allow my frustrations to pour out. I never truly loved you, I scraped past my GCSE’s, battled through my A Level and shed a lot of tears during my degree but I powered through and came out with a first. So hey ho, go me. You served me well right? Alas let me get this across, if somebody would have sat me down towards the end of high school and gone through all the options out there for young people my mind set could have been different and maybe I’d be less bitter. But apparently the only path to your success is a degree and once you have this magical piece of paper stating ‘Chelsey Lamb, First Class with Honours BSc’ you are guaranteed your dream job even with a CV full of experience. So tell me education why hasn’t this panned out? Maybe it’s because not every dream job needs a £27,000 worthy piece of paper or some young people aren’t destined to take the University path of life… or maybe just maybe a degree isn’t needed.

Whilst I am left bitter and angry at the world but also myself for not realising this sooner I must say it’s opened my mind to what’s out there. I am my own path to success, I determine exactly where I want to go and which route I should take. Surely this should be enforced? Making children feel pressured into thinking they should do this, this and this straight away only makes them take bad choices and sometimes like myself, the wrong ones. I am from a working class background, I worked my backside off over the 3 years and worked various jobs to support myself as the finance offered didn’t even cover my rent at times but now I believe I chose the wrong career plans, pressured from what teachers were telling me I was good at and making me believe I could never do anything else.  But what if my career choices changed and I need another fancy piece paper and another? Surely as humans we have the choice to be who we want to be yet there’s so many rules, price tags and regulations stopping us from having that freedom to find ourselves.

I can only learn from this and try and excel to be better than my degree, to leave my footprint on the world and see and do things I want to do not what somebody else with a degree tells me. Even now as I watch my little sister go into college with hopes of being a teacher the education system felt she most likely wouldn’t pass all her exams so never offered her the chance to take them all, meaning she left high school with not enough GCSE’s in her back pocket; alongside the BTEC grades that no longer matter? So what you’re now saying is 5 years of taking science and getting a pass is irrelevant because universities don’t want that on their heads? What about her basic education rights? What happened to giving young people the best head start in life? Yet you’re putting false hope in their minds and giving them your expectations.

So please education system, let us as young people breathe and see what’s out there. Apprenticeships and jobs and everything else life has to offer. Your fancy piece of papers can wait for now. Just give us a chance.

Sincerely,

Chelsey Lamb

Ole' London Town


My baby sister turned 13 the Thursday just gone so I took her to London for the day on Saturday to celebrate. We went on our own mini adventure (we walked about 7 miles - my bones can't handle it anymore!) ate lots of food and soaked up lots of English sun for once, being from Manchester means we just see the rain and clouds 88% of the time. Thanks to our Gramps for hooking us up we got to travel down first class and eat free pastries and drink unlimited coffee. We visited Baker Street to see our friend Sherlock before hanging with Kim K, R Pattz and the Queen at Madame Tussauds. We did have tickets for the London Eye but the queues were INSANE. Being from Manchester I'm all city prepared but wasn't expecting the mass of tourists/people in general, it was crazy. I love London but I don't think I've got it in me to live there.



It's a pretty city though, makes you proud to be British the buildings are so rich with history we spent half the time wondering what rich person once lived there and what input they had on our society. It's crazy how rich the city looks in the centre. Days like these make me want to adventure more and more and just not return haha (one day?!)









Overall it was such a nice day, I don't get to spend as half as much time as I'd like with Molly and it's so strange to see her turning into the little mini me and woman she's becoming. She'll always be my baby sister at heart but she's definitely on the right tracks to becoming a fabulous young lady... obviously takes after her fabulous big sister. Also, if anybody ever has the chance to eat at an Ed's Easy Diner DO IT the food is AMAZING, I had the hot dog covered in cheese sauce, BBQ sauce and bacon with sweet potato fries and onion rings. Oh my days.... it was one of the best meals I've ever had and is a heart attack of carbs definitely worth having. 

Oh London, I loved you I could've spent a week getting lost in you and discovering the millions of cute little shops in Camden and exploring Covent Gardens more or drinking fancy coffee in Soho. Again we will meet, but until then I'll reminisce. It's weird being from the UK but not being able to pop into London like there's no tomorrow. Virgin trains and their two hour rides are definitely worth it. Until next time my sweet sweet capital city.

Chels
xo

Colour Run 2015

I took part in the Colour Run last week in Honour of my old bosses brother in law David Bean and in aid of Rainbow Trust. What an experience! It was at the City Stadium in Manchester and was the happiest 5k on the planet. You run, get covered in colour, run, get covered in colour until you look like a fabulous rainbow. I'd definitely recommend anybody doing one if you ever get the chance, you don't have to be fit, you can run, walk, jog, crawl it's all about taking part and being happy. 



I obviously took it upon myself to GoPro it and throw together the happiest 5k video! To anybody who wants a durable, hardwearing HD camera I'd definitely recommend the GoPro, I got the 4 for christmas but the touch screen kept over heating and freezing so I went for the 3+ which syncs up to your iPhone app so you can control it directly through there. It's ace. What have you been taking part in this summer?
Until next time,
Chels 
xo

The end of an era

I'm back, I lost my blogging touch and let the adult life of full time boring mundane work get to me, but I vow NO MORE as I need my inner creative ninja to shine and take pretty photos and blog about things that make me happy. I'm sure most of you never noticed I was gone but either way I'm back and hopefully here to stay. These past few weeks/months have been a roller coaster but I'm getting there. Adult job life is still boring but I love holidays and that requires funds so I will persevere in the meantime.

One major update... I am now a FIRST CLASS HONOURS Graduate with a BSc in Broadcast and Media Production.


I still can't quite believe it and wasn't prepared for it in the slightest, I remember opening my results and sitting there for a good 30 minutes thinking 'should I tell anyone?! What if it changes?' hahaha, but alas I did it! all that blood, sweat and tears and constant bad thoughts I powered through and came out on top. So I guess what I'm trying to say is... GRADUATE LOOKING FOR MEDIA WORK. I was so set on never working in Media but after receiving my mark I think the realisation that I can do this and I am worthy set in. So to anybody who has there sights set on something, don't give up. If I can do it, anybody can. 







If anything I think Graduation put things into perspective for me, it made me realise how determined I've been these past few years despite all my moans and frustrations and struggles, I worked throughout to support myself and achieved the highest possible bachelor degree, I couldn't be prouder of myself for once. So what lies next is beyond me, I'm sending CVs out like crazy in the hope some top-dog producer wants to give me a chance. I'm going on a few adventures this year and even some next year already so for now I just gotta stop over-thinking and take the days as they come. Life doesn't stop for anyone so we gotta grasp what we can get and enjoy every second of it. Dream big world.


Chels
xo

The happiness list

In order to keep the positive vibes flowing (even on days I don't think it's possible) I want to post a list each weekend as a reminder to myself of the things that made happy within those 7 days. The list can be as short and as long as the memories that made me smile.

1. Girls nights out


Last night I went out with my four favourite ever ever girls and got too drunk and ate too much food and danced to so much cheese I was in my element. After the past few weeks it was the best cure and was my favourite smile of the week. Sometimes you just need to let go and enjoy yourself and come home when the sun is rising. It was epic.

2. My Family


My Mum, Dad and two sisters are in Portugal right now and it made me realise how much I miss being with them. Since coming home from Uni I've moved in with my Auntie because there wasn't enough room back home anymore and it just made me feel so out of it - don't get me wrong I couldn't go because of work but seeing them enjoying the beautiful weather and seeing pictures of them smiling and being together makes me value them so much more. Everything I am and do is because of them and I wouldn't change a second of my past 21 years being surrounded by them.

3. Dreaming

In my hungover state this evening, I sat back and mentally listed all the places I want to see. These dreams are only gonna happen by sticking out my dead end job and racking up all the money in the world to live the dreams I've had for so long. The dreams are only going to happen if I put my all into it and that's exactly what I'm going to do. 

It's only a short one this week to get the ball rolling as it's been a long few weeks and I think I let myself fall back into old habits and bad thoughts but I need to focus on where I want to be and what I want to achieve and I have no doubt I will accomplish that. I think sometimes we need to take a step back in certain situations and analyse where we are and if we're happy enough to follow the path. Although the job I'm currently doing isn't for me, I have to do it to get where I want to be. I know that now. Stay awesome world and keep dreaming.

Chels
xo

Adapting


I do apologise... it has been quite awhile since I last blogged to the world. This past month has been roller coaster and I've found it hard to adapt to real adult life, 40 hour weeks and a job that doesn't particularly fuel my creative drive. I've felt deflated in a way and become un-chelsey like. I eat, go to work, come home, sleep in a constant cycle 5 days a week, even when I'm doing things on weekend with friends I just don't feel like I'm truly there. You know what the most frustrating thing is? The statement people around me keep saying 'you're young, it will come to you' and don't get me wrong, I understand that completely I'm sure there's people at many stages in life when they're questioning if what they're doing is the right thing but for me, it's the scariest thought. I'm an over-thinker and although I like the sense of living in that moment, I don't like not knowing what's round the corner for me. It's my biggest fear, coming out of Uni not wanting to do what I've dreamt about for so long and realising there really isn't much more I want to do makes me feel like I've hit a brick wall. I just want to travel but saving up is taking so long I'm scared life will take over and I'll get stuck in a rut. But anyway, that's enough of that moment. I'll plod on, I always do I just hope one of these mornings I wake up and it's clicked, my brain has pinged and I know exactly where I wanna be and what I wanna do. Until then, I'll dream big world.


My life hasn't been too dull in between! I officially officially finished Uni and wait anxiously for my results before graduating in July, I've drank a lot of cocktails and had some fabulous nights out, I've met new friends and ate so much food I really need to have a word with myself and start gym-ing properly again. I voted (although I'm sure half of the UK feel as though it didn't count - one day it will) and I saw the most fabulous S Club 7 live in concert and screamed my lungs off like my inner 8 year old did when I last saw them. My holiday countdown is slowly but surely ticking away and I also recently booked Paris in January for my baby sister's 18th, yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Paris is one of my favourite cities; I can visit over and over and still be in awe each time.

My main goal right now is writing, blogging and channeling my inner creative soul to feel more Chelsey like so if you guys have got any project/ideas that you do or want to do, then please pass them along in the comments or via twitter @beingchelsey. I'm setting myself half way through the year resolutions and hopefully happiness and fabulousness will follow. Maybe one day my blogs won't be so ranty! but a dream eh? haha. But thanks world for being on the other end of the computer screen with nice messages every now and again it really does help. As Sir Albus Dumbledore once said 'Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light'.

Until next time guys,

Chels
xoxo

Bad habits

"the body achieves what the mind believes"


So I recently went down a path that hasn't been so familiar to me in awhile and lost control of something that I'd been so on track with for so long. For those who follow or have read a few of my posts you'll have picked up that I've been on a lifestyle change journey for awhile. My back has been bad and I used it to escape back into the world of glorious glorious bad food, it's just so easy to slip into old habits and I've never been able to stop or know when I'm full.

I'm using this post as a note to myself if you will, the more I write about the bad I'm putting into my body the more it should sink in, right? I've sat and made meal plans for the next week and re-signed up to the gym in Manchester along with a sports therapy session on Tuesday to see what's really happening back there, my neck snaps, my back pops and I'm in a constant cycle of tension and stiffness. It's really a pain in the arse. I think it's become my biggest fear to become the person I used to be even though sometimes I remember being happier then, more carefree and I didn't let what society defined me as size wise effect me. It's weird isn't it how the more weight loss or change you undergo the more self conscious you feel. But alas I've never had more body confidence and I felt fabulous, I've never been as low as I was and despite the pounds I've put on these past few weeks I'm still constantly proud of how far I've come. Sometimes we just needed reminding.

I've become so wrapped in becoming societies idea of perfect I think I lost a bit of Chelsey along the way, I am beautiful inside and out. I guess sometimes I need to remind myself. That and not to lose sight of my own goals and dreams, keeping in mind my own happiness along the way. So to anybody else out there that is struggling, I guess this post is to say you're not alone. We all have bad days, weeks, months but as long as we're happy then do what you gotta do. Right now, I'm not happy and I'm gonna change that. Knowing what you want is the best way to be; don't let anybody influence how you should live your life or how you should look. If you're not happy, change something and if you are, then carry on and be proud of everything you are as a person. I think I'm gonna start making end of weekly posts in regards to a food diary to try and keep it fun and inspire and showcase recipes whilst motivating myself. If you've got any favourite low carb treats and foods you'd recommend let me know either on here or via my twitter @beingchelsey. I'd really appreciate it.

Thanks for listening world, until next time...

Chels
xo

New digs


Howdy y'all! So much has changed since I last posted. I've left Liverpool, left my job and started a new one, moved house and entered the adult 40 hour week life! Stayed tuned for an update post but I just wanted to share my favourite thing about moving home and house... having a new bedroom to use as a blank canvas. My favourite place is always my bedroom and I use that canvas to make me feel as at home as possible, I think the spaces we live in become a reflection of us and our personalities. So make it kick ass.








I love maps, my biggest dream is to explore some of the world's very depths so surrounding myself in world, city or even country maps makes my dreams feel more alive. I also love reminding myself in little quotes to be thankful for what I have or that happiness is the key to our very existence. I'm trying to become a positive person so I believe surrounding yourself in the smallest of ways makes your days easier to get through. Everything I put onto my walls are photos of my travels, memories, artwork that I like or tickets I want to remember for ever. Does anybody else like decorating their rooms in such away that when you're locked away no matter how many problems you have outside those four walls everything seems okay? Maybe it's just me.

I'd love to see some of your guys latest decor projects, have you been up to anything?
Now that I'm home and slightly settled I look forward to posting more and reading blog posts like there's no tomorrow!

Speak soon world,
Chels
xo

A New Chapter


As I sit here coffee in hand, assignments rotating around my brain, I've been thinking back on the past 3 years of my life. I've done a lot of growing up physically and emotionally, Uni has tested me and pushed me beyond my limits which in the long run is a good thing but I can honestly say I don't think it's been for me, or at least the route of study I took.

I was mislead and given false hope, like you've probably read before in my rambles but I'm a strong believer in having your own choice and I think when growing up we're mislead into what opportunities are out there for us; being given the impression that going to University is the only path to success and accomplishment. That is wrong, as I embark on a new journey and a career that has took a slight off course route I couldn't be more terrifyingly excited for where I'm going to end up, something University has never given me. Don't get me wrong, some degrees are needed as they give you the skills and the knowledge to go into an amazing career, but a lot of degrees nowadays aren't worthy enough; we could get the skills and more being in the industry first hand and learning practically. Not what some old guy has to throw at you in a lecture theater that's outdated and they probably haven't really got a clue either. I've spent far too long in my own shadow that I kept losing sight of the shore, I work myself up so much to the point that I don't want to carry on because the fear of failure takes over, but no more. I have so much to give and take from the world that I intend on living every experience to the extreme. The dreams I've had for so long will be accomplished and a piece of paper I've been awarded with to define me into a certain life category won't play any part of that.

However it isn't all bad, I've almost kicked a degree's arse that at many times I thought was impossible, I've met some amazing people and I've had some amazing adventures. I've become the best version of myself and I found happiness in the long run, pulling myself out of the rut I was in for so long. I have spent far too long worrying about people's opinions and lived my life tip-toeing around them, but I've found the balance and I say no more. My lecturer went round on the first day of year 1 and took a picture of us all to prove that in year 3 a lot of us wouldn't be there and to say 'how far we've come' but the biggest accomplishment of all for me is becoming the version of me I'm proud of. If I could go back and have a 5 minute chat with myself, I'd probably be coming out of my degree having a more positive experience (I probably wouldn't still be in this degree if that could've happened, if only!).
So, 3 year ago Chelsey with the excitement still shining in your eyes, you did it. Well done. If I take anything away from these few years it's the drive and motivation I've found myself to have. Although I've cried and stressed and screamed and shouted, I didn't give up. I've stuck it out, I've had all my ducks in a row from day one. I've worked through the 3 years and financed myself because student loans don't finance the average, and I've come out of this place with my head held high and all my priorities are in place.
For now who know's what is in store for me, but I'm beginning to realise that if we wake up each day with a positive mindset, positive things will happen, and to everyone who's been a part of my journey (and stuck through all the stress and nagging) thank you. I couldn't be the person I am today without you.

Chels
xo

Be who YOU want to be.


I've been off the exercise/healthy eating band wagon for a weeks and I've never felt worse about myself. It's like I can't stop but I hate it when I'm doing it. I'm constantly in a state of worry about my appearance and weight, something I've never experienced before and I don't like it. I've been on this lifestyle change for just over a year and a half now and although I've never been happier when I look in the mirror, emotionally it's ruined my mind. All my brain thinks about is calories and carbs and the size of the jeans I'm wearing. I've grew up in the shadows of my pretty friends and I've always been that bit bigger than those around me. So these past two years I've taken the time to try and change what I didn't like or more so what others didn't like.

In creating yourself for someone to see, you are losing who you were truly meant to be. 

I've just come across this quote and it really made me think about my actions and the mindset I'm currently in. I've spent SO much time trying to be that person I thought everybody else wanted; what society wanted that I lost some of Chelsey along the way. Don't get me wrong I don't want to go back into the person I used to be and I'm sure the food worry will never truly disappear, I've made myself healthier and fitter but I lost that spark that made me, me along the way. I look back at 15/16 year old me and I had the world at my feet, I had so many hopes and dreams and I was happy being that version of me. I was this happy go-getting bubbly kid that didn't have a care in the world. I don't really know what I'm getting at with this post but I felt like I needed to get it off my chest; after eating bad for the past few weeks it's brought me down lower than I have been in awhile. I think the pile up of stress with finishing Uni in two weeks whilst trying to finish my endless assignments, working what feels like hundreds of hours, running a marathon, finishing one job and starting a new one has gotten to me. Life is happening and I don't like it?!?!??!

I guess we just have to take these moments sometimes, let our brain work overtime in worrying and hopefully wake up with them all gone away. I just think there's so much pressure out there nowadays in feeling right and looking perfect otherwise we're just outcasts. I'll never be society's definition of perfect and I'm okay with that but why should there be a definition of perfect in today's society? We're big, small, round, thin, curvy and we're all perfect right? Maybe society should constantly remind us of that. You don't have to be a size 0, just be healthy and happy. As long as you've got that you've cracked it. These next few weeks I'm going to get back on track physically and emotionally, I have to focus on my happiness and think positively, because then positive things will happen. As long as we maintain that mindset I'm sure we can defy everything and what society perceives as 'perfect' can kiss my arse.

Be you and stay beautiful guys.



Chels
xo 

New Brighton part deux


So to celebrate national sibling day I spent the day with one of my lovely sisters, we're quite a close family and my two sisters are definitely my best friends so seeing them when I'm not in Uni or working is a quite an honour. Demi came down to Liverpool to stay with me and since the weather was beautiful we had to venture out. A couple of months ago we went to New Brighton but the weather was ice cold, the waves were crashing and I swear the wind was painful! So we thought we'd go check it out whilst the sun has began to shine.

It was such a nice little day, the atmosphere was buzzing and everybody was happy to see the sun. I love that as Brits it's law that as soon as there is some sun we must run to the nearest beach, pitch our tents and bring out the buckets and spades. So after a quick shopping session in Liverpool we got the train under the Mersey drank Starbucks, played bowling (I'm so awful), ate ice cream, walked along the sea front, drank far too many cocktails and ate far too much food.

  








I'd definitely check out the hungry horse pub and restaurant they've got there if you ever go. The food is sooooooo good! two meals for £8.99 and this whopper of a starter... oops. Quick post but overall a lovely national siblings day. A break in life that I definitely needed. Now all I crave is a ruddy holiday!!!

I'm starting back at Uni next week for my final two weeks, then I go straight into my new job and the real world. I'm excited and scared and scared but here goes, no turning back. I also recently won a £50 voucher for the Manchester Arndale shopping centre, so I'll brag and post about it when I've collected and spent my winnings, how exciting. For now, I need to get back on my diet, revise for my exams and enjoy my last bit of student life. (Still don't know what 'adult' is!)



Until next time world. I hope life's throwing shit loads of lemons at you and you're making some cool ass lemonade.


Chels
xo

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